My YouTube notification popped up. With delight, I saw Cody Townsend had uploaded another FIFTY episode – line number 46 - the Bloody Couloir. It had been a while since a new episode had dropped – something to be expected as the lines he had left to complete became rowdier and more technical.
I smiled, thinking I would wait till the afternoon to watch the episode, when I had the house to myself. My workday slipped by – a steady stream of emails and phone calls and busy work. Finally, the last "urgent" email answered and the last Zoom call over, I grabbed a cup of water, flipped on the TV, and got comfortable on the couch.
Cody's face filled the screen. He was sitting in a lawn chair, mountains ranged behind him. The first words out of his mouth broke my heart. Literally.
"Here it is," he said. "The final episode of The FIFTY."
Wait? What? There were still four lines to go.
Cody continued talking, but, honestly, his words didn't make sense – something about how he would continue to try and complete the project, but no promises, blah, blah, blah.
I sat there confused and watched the final episode, not really understanding what was happening. After the last credit rolled, I walked out to our front porch, sat on the old Centennial Lift chair, and gently rocked back and forth while absently gazing up at the backside of Brundage in the distance.
My mind wandered back through the last five years, remembering how I stumbled across Cody's first episode while I was researching how to get started in backcountry skiing. In some weird way, as his project grew and his skill improved, so did mine. I found myself watching his videos not only for entertainment, but also to see how he and his team solved problems in the mountains, what gear they used, and how they planned their adventures.
Here in McCall, I moved from skinning inbounds to hiking lift-served terrain like Sargent's to more ambitious projects with longer approaches and more difficult decision-making.
Now, seeing Cody wrap up his project, I suddenly felt lost – like maybe I hadn't accomplished enough in the last five years or maybe I hadn't pushed hard enough. It was a strange feeling – I didn't realize the impact his series was having on me until it was gone. Weird.
As the night progressed, my mindset settled, and the story I told myself became more positive. I thought back through the last five years and realized I'd made way more progress than I had given myself credit for. The adventures I'd had, the level of fitness I'd attained, and my plans for the future were amazing. I realized, if I could go back in time and tell myself what I'd accomplish in the next five years and what I'd plan for the five years after, I'd be very happy – in fact, I might not believe it was possible.
It's a good feeling.
Enjoy your spring break adventures this week. If you're looking for a little something-something to pass the time as you travel, you can watch Cody's last FIFTY episode here.
